Emotional intelligence
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- Emotions
- The master aptitude
- Good moods
- Hope
- Optimism
- Self-efficacy
- Flow
- Person styles for dealing with emotions
- Multiple intelligences
- Abilities
- How to learn
- Emotional relearning
- Temperament
- Key ingredients of active prevention programs
- The self science curriculum
Emotions
Emotion = to move
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The master aptitude
Channelling emotions towards a productive end
- controlling impulse
- regulating moods
- motivation to try again
- entering flow
Good moods
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enhance flexible thinking
Laughter- as tension release
- increases flexibility of thought
- encourage risk taking
Hope
"Believing you have both the will and the way to accomplish your goals, whatever they may be"
- People with high levels of hope motivate themselves, are more resourceful, flexible, can switch goals, break down tasks into smaller pieces.
Optimism
- See failure as something that can be changed to succeed the next time around.
- Achievement is a function not just of talent but a capacity to stand defeat
Self-efficacy
Approaching failure in terms of how to handle it rather than worrying what might go wrong
Flow
Get into flow by- intentionally focussing on the task in hand
- engaging in a level which slightly taxes ability
Strained concentration > increased cortical activation > increased anxiety > decreased performance
Person styles for dealing with emotions
- Self aware - clarity about emotions
- Engulfed - swamped by emotions
- Accepting - no change, though aware
Multiple intelligences
- Verbal
- Mathematical-logical
- Spatial capacity
- Kinaesthetic
- Musical
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Interpersonal skills
- Organising groups
- Negotiating solutions
- Personal connection
- Social analysis
- Intrapsychic capacity (insight skills)
Abilities
- Leadership
- Nurture relationships
- Resolve conflicts
- Social analysis
How to learn
- Confidence - of a likelihood of success and that adults will be helpful.
- Curiosity - a sense that finding out about things is positive and leads to pleasure.
- Intentionality - the wish and capacity to have an impact, and to act upon that with persistence. This is related to a sense of confidence, being effective.
- Self control
- Relatedness - the ability to engage with others based on the sense of being understood by and understanding others.
- Capacity to communicate - exchanging ideas, feelings, concepts. Related toi a sense of trust with others and pleasure in engaging.
- Cooperativeness - balancing needs with others in the group.
Emotional relearning
The helpless person who thinks "I'm dead" in a dangerous situation is more susceptible to post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) - the feeling that ones life is in danger and there is nothing that can be done to escape it. These symptoms of learned fearfulness can be accounted for by changes in the amygdala:
- numbing of certain feelings
- neural hijacking - life is on the verge of becoming an emergency
This can result in fear conditioning - something not threatening becomes dreaded and associated with something frightening. This normally subsides with time and natural relearning. By reliving the trauma safely, the memory gradually becomes desensitised.
- Regain a sense of safety.
- Regain a sense of control over what is happening.
- Retelling and reconstruction of the story to develop a more realistic understanding of and response to the traumatic memory that it triggers.
- Mourn the loss the trauma brought.
While we cannot decide when we have emotional outbursts, we have control over how long the last. Trauma memories can be visited like any other memory rather than erupt uncontrollably.
Temperament
Moods that typify our emotional life:
- timid
- bold
- upbeat
- melancholy
Key ingredients of active prevention programs
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Emotional skills
- Identifying and labelling feelings
- Expressing feelings
- Assessing the intensity of feelings
- Managing feelings
- Delaying gratification
- Controlling impulses
- Reducing stress
- Knowing the difference between feelings and actions
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Cognitive skills
- Self talk - conducting an inner dialogue
- Reading and interpreting social cues - social influences on behaviour and seeing oneself in the perspective of a larger community
- Using steps for problem solving and decision making
- Understanding the perspective of others
- Understanding behavioural norms
- A positive attitude towards life
- Self-awareness
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Behavioural skills
- Nonverbal
- Verbal
The self science curriculum
- Self-awareness
- Personal decision making
- Managing feelings
- Handling stress
- Empathy
- Communications - talking about feelings effectively
- Self-disclosure
- Insight
- Self-acceptance
- Personal responsibility
- Assertiveness
- Group dynamics
- Conflict resolution
EI resources
Further emotional intelligence resources
Reference: Emotional Intelligence - Daniel Goleman